We were promised that technology would bring us closer, that instant communication, endless connection, and algorithmic compatibility would make relationships easier. But reality is quietly proving the opposite.
Despite being more “connected” than any generation in history, people today are struggling to form meaningful bonds, especially in marriage.
The Signs of a Relationship Crisis
Across the globe, relationship statistics are painting a sobering picture.
People are marrying later and less often
- In the US, the average age of first marriage is now over 30 for men and 28 for women.
- In many Muslim communities, similar trends are emerging.
- Marriage is delayed, deprioritized, or seen as too risky.
Divorce is at an all-time high
- In Malaysia, the divorce rate increased by over 45% in the last decade.
- Globally, divorce is more normalized than ever, often following short-lived, unstable unions.
Out-of-wedlock births are soaring
- In many Western countries, over 40% of births now occur outside of marriage.
- The institution of family itself is becoming optional, if not obsolete.
And underneath it all, social media sits silently in the background, shaping how we think, feel, and interact.
How Social Media Warps Relationships
From an Islamic perspective, relationships are built on niyyah (intent), haya (modesty), amanah (trust), and sakinah (tranquility). But social media encourages the opposite.
Superficiality over sincerity
Platforms are driven by looks, performance, and filters.
The heart is rarely what’s seen first.
We scroll past souls.
Comparison over contentment
Constant exposure to curated couples, perfect proposals, and glamorous weddings leads to dissatisfaction.
People begin to want a brand, not a bond.
Availability without commitment
Endless access to attention dulls the value of real connection.
People fear missing out, so they don’t choose anyone, or they never stop looking.
Emotional exposure with no accountability
Harmless DMs, flirty comments, and situationships slowly erode the line between halal and haram until there’s nothing sacred left.
The Islamic Alternative
Islam doesn’t fear connection, it honors it. But it frames it within boundaries meant to protect our dignity, our peace, and our futures. The Qur’an doesn’t just tell us to marry, it tells us to seek sukoon (tranquility), rahmah (mercy), and mawaddah (affection) through that bond (Surah Ar-Rum 30:21).
Not followers,
not likes,
not impressions.
Marriage in Islam is not a side quest, it is a foundation, a fortress, a place to build, not just browse.
A Final Reminder
Social media is not inherently evil. But without discipline and purpose, it becomes a space where sincerity dies and connection is commodified.
The further we drift from the Islamic framework of relationships, the more unstable our lives become, and the more society suffers.
We don’t need to cancel social media.
But we do need to re-center our values.
We need to remember that real love doesn’t go viral.
It goes quiet.
It grows slowly.
It fears Allah.
And it doesn’t need an audience.
Middle Nation
Reflections from the middle path
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